Maybe it's because this is my last semester in residence here (finishing coursework and exams and teaching), but ever since getting back from winter break I've found it next to impossible to keep my mind on any one thing. I've been reading blogs, and not commenting, because maintaining bloggy relationships felt so hard when I felt like I was losing my grasp on real life ones. A few people have commented that they blog less when they're being productive, happy, and well-organized; I've experienced exactly the opposite. I don't know quite what I've been unhappy about, so I've felt loath to blog about some nebulous feeling of anomie.
Partly, that's a lie: the Big issue, the semi-long-distance relationship, has just never gone away. After this semester, it won't be a problem, since I'll be officially moving back to City at the Center of the Universe (while maintaining a place to stay here). So it feels like I'm in the home stretch, which is part of the frustration -- it should just be over, right?
This forward-looking preoccupation has caused me to become far more scatterbrained than usual. I am usually a Master of Organization. I remember little details and keep track of them and bug other people about them.
I drive into town for a rehearsal, find a nice parking spot, and start walking toward my destination. 3/4 of the way there, I realize that my left hand is (as usual) grasping my wallet in my left pocket, but my right hand is not grasping my keys in my right pocket. Oh no. Keys are not in my pockets, not in my bag. I jog back to the car, thankful that I'm wearing long underwear under my pants and that I left plenty of time. Keys are...
in the ignition
with the engine running.
Yes, I LEFT MY CAR RUNNING. This is an East Coast City, not, like, Fargo. For some reason, I did remember to put the Club on before I left.
Luckily, my car is smart enough not to automatically lock when the keys are in the ignition, or I would have felt like even more of a fool.
So I am now determined to get my fucking shit together. I am not a dope, and I will not act like one. This includes blogging and commenting on y'all's blogs, which I have not been doing although I have been reading all your posts.
On a more positive note, I made a mushroom pate this weekend. De-lish.